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Three
Police squads, The Scotland Yard police,
The NY Police and the Indian brigade contest
for the best police force ward. The judges
lead them to the Gir forest of India and
assign them the mission. He who captures
an adult lion and brings it back alive in
the fastest time will be adjudged the best.
....... First Scotland yard goes into the
forest and comes back in half an our with
a Lion all tied up.
........Then the NY police go in and come
back in 15 minutes with a tied up lion.
........Lastly the Indian brigade goes in,
15 minutes, half an hour, one hour and no
sign of our Indian brigade. The judges give
up and decide to search for them. They go
into the forest. After some searching, they
find Indian brigade all excitedly yelling
near a tree. The Indian brigade have tied
up a big bear to a tree and one of them
is shouting,"Bol tu Sher Hai ! Saala Bol
! tu Sher Hai !!(Admit that you are a lion!)
*
* *
One
police officer asks to another officer "Do
you pray before your meal?" the other replies
" no its not necessary for me , because
my wife cooks very well"
Contributed by Nilesh
***
A
lady driving a car was stopped by two patrolmen
on a busy road in a town. Apprehensive,
the lady stopped. The patrolmen came to
her and greeted her and said "Congratulations,
Ma'am.We have been watching you for the
last few days and have found that you are
the safest driver in town. So, the Chief
of Police sends his compliments to you"
and handed her a flower. The lady accepted
the flower and thanked the patrolmen ,who
greeted her again and left. After their
departure, the lady took a deep sigh of
relief. She did not have a driving license.
Contributed by Mr. R. N. Mathur, Addl.
DGP (Administration)
***
Little
boy to father: "If George Washington
was as honest as you say he was,why do they
close all banks on his birthday ?"
***
A DIG and a Commandant of the Armed Police
were relaxing on the lounge of the mess.
The converstion turned towards their orderlies
a short while later. Each one claimed that
his orderly was a fool. The two decided
to compare. The commandant called for his
orderly and said, "Ram Singh here is a ten
rupees note go and purchase an Ambassador
car from the market right now and bring
it here. "Right Sir", said the orderly.
He took the note from the officer saluated
and went back. Then the DIG called his orderly
and told him, "Prem Singh, go to my office
and see whether I'm sitting there or not.
"Right Sir", the orderly said and went back.
The two officers had a hearty laugh not
realising that the orderlies were talking
outside. Ram Singh was saying, "Prem Singh,
look at my stupid boss he doesn't even know
that the market is closed today and the
car cannot be bought". "And look at my boss
Ram Singh, he wants me to go and see whether
he is in his office or not. Why can't he
ring up and find out. I've never seen such
a lazy officer in my life".
***
A
boy was caught stealing a watch from a shop.
He was taken into police custody and put
in lock-up. A seasoned criminal there showed
some sympathy and said, "You are wasting
your time on small items, why don't you
rob a bank?" After thinking for a little
while the boy replied, "By the time I leave
school, all banks are closed."
Contributed
by Radhika, NJ
***
The police sent out the picture of an escaped
convict in six different poses. A constable
sent the following wireless message : "Have
captured five of them and on trail of the
sixth."
***
A
shoplifter was caught red-handed trying
to steal a watch from an exclusive jewelry
store. "Listen," said the shoplifter, "I
know you don't want any trouble either.
What do you say I just buy the watch and
we forget about this?" The manager agreed
and wrote up the sales slip. The crook looked
at the slip and said, "This is a little
more than I intended to spend. Can you show
me something less expensive?"
***
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